I work hard at the things I deem necessary in life. I study when I need to. I practice things I need to. I do everything I feel I need to as best I can.
Unfortunately, in the world I live in, a lot of things are only somewhat necessary.
My name is Kenji Fujima. I'm 17 years old. Blood type O-. 181 Centimeters tall. 119 Kilograms of weight. High school 2nd year.
I am overweight. I am well aware of this. I could probably lose weight if I really wanted to, but I just don't see a need.
So long as my blood pressure stays at a reasonable level and I keep my cholesterol low I shouldn't have any issues. I follow the philosophy of "leave tomorrow's problems to tomorrow's me."
It's not as if being fit would accomplish anything anyway. Being fit is really just an extra bonus for working hard. Why would I care to be fit if my life didn't deem it necessary? I don't need to run ever nor do I need to lift anything heavy. I occasionally do a pushup or two in order to keep myself from deteriorating, but it's not as if I do a lot of them.
The way I see it, it's like being a car enthusiast. Sure you can drive really fast, but unless you're under very specific circ.u.mstances you can't break the speed limit or you will get a ticket. It's the same thing for being really fit. Sure a fit guy can run on a treadmill for longer than I can, but other than a treadmill what else would that person run on? It's the same logic.
No I am not saying this because I don't have a girlfriend.
Anyway, I've explained my reasoning. You want to know what I am doing right now? I'm shopping at my local convenience store. The newest volume of a manga I've been reading just got released and I want to get it. Reading manga is one of my favorite hobbies after all. The only thing that trumps reading manga for me is completing raids with my online friends in MMO's.
"Hmm… is it here?"
"What are you looking for sir?"
"The newest volume of Naremo Squadron. I heard you guys had it."
"My apologies sir, we recently sold the last copy."
Sheesh. So this is why people have been switching to digital formats.
The store clerk seems to be grimacing. I bet the clerk feels bad about not having the manga and is afraid that I will take out my anger on him. It's probably best to ease the tension.
"Ah well. I can't blame you, it's not your fault." I sighed out while giving a light smile.
"ah. Thank you sir."
The clerk seems to be a bit more relaxed. I made the right call.
Well it's not like I'd take my frustration out on the guy working here. The clerk probably doesn't decide the stock of every item.
I decided to grab a bag of chips and a bottle of water instead. I had a raid later so these would be my rations for the night.
As I approached the counter, a guy in a hoodie came into the store. I wasn't really paying attention because I just wanted my things, but I noticed the cashier's expression shifted to something resembling fear.
"Get out of my way fatty."
Someone just grabbed my shoulder and attempted to shove me out of the way. This is very confusing. What's going on?
"Hey, what? What's happening?" I asked while turning around.
Instinctively, I resisted and shoved the arm off.
Apparently, this was a bad call.
"You piece of s.h.i.t! Take this!"
That was the last sentence I heard. The next thing I saw was something pointing at my head and then everything going black.
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Huh. Where am I? What the h.e.l.l just happened? Where are my chips?
As I was searching the strange room, I noticed that I've never been here before. It appears to resemble a more traditional style j.a.panese home complete with tatami mats and a small table with a teapot on top. I'm very confused.
I… probably won't find my chips anywhere.
As I was searching the small room for anything resembling a bag of chips, The paper door in front of me opened with a Thump noise followed by the soft creaking of footsteps as an old man in a grey robe walked into the room and closed the door behind himself.
The old man rounded his shoulders as if they were very stiff, sat down, and began to speak. "Well, I wasn't expecting anyone right now. Welcome."
The old man motioned for me to sit with him as well on the opposite side of the table. Despite my confusion, I can at least get some answers. I have a lot of questions after all.
"Um... Oji-san, where am I and who are you?" I asked in a timid manner. Old people tend to have the shortest fuses from my experience.
"Woah, slow down son, one at a time." the old man insisted while holding his hand out in front of me as if to stop me.
They were just 2 questions, and two basic ones at that! Sheesh, what is this old man's problem?
Sigh. I guess I'll have to play by the old man's rules though.
"Okay… Where am I?"
"Well, to begin with, you have just died. This is the 'Judgment Room' where I… uh… judge people. Hence the name 'Judgement room'."
Wait, what did this old man just say? I've begun to hyperventilate. Oh no I hope I don't have a panic attack. I bet this old man is just pranking me!
I need to get to the bottom of this. I need to be direct.
"Hold on Oji-san. I'm not dead, I'm sitting in this room and talking to you right now! If I were dead then how would this be possible?"
The old man brought a small handbook out of the inside of his shirt, opened it up, and said "According to what my handbook says, a robber shot you in the head from 7 centimeters away with a handgun. You're absolutely 100% dead. I'm sorry."
As the old man finished his sentence, he closed the book with one hand and a loud Thump noise could be heard reverberating throughout the room. The old man proceeded to return his book into his shirt.
I blinked a few times in bewilderment. This can't be real. I'm on one of those weird prank shows! I got shot in the head? I'm dead? I'm in a judgment room? This guy knows exactly what happened? There's no way. I refuse to believe that any of this happened.
Except...
"Wait so… That wasn't a dream?" I could hear myself whispering. I didn't realize I had started talking until after I had already finished.
"Nope. Totally real. Sorry about that." the old man yawned while shrugging.
Well, I may as well go for broke.
"I don't suppose I got to keep my chips with me…?"
"…" The old man just sat there while staring at me.
The atmosphere in the room is a bit awkward. I've never really been that great at talking to people I have nothing in common with. If I just knew something about this guy then I could talk with him easier… Hey, wait a minute, who even is this guy?
"Hey, Oji-san, who are you?"
"I'm G.o.d... At least, I'm one of 'em. It's a long story so please don't worry about it." he waved his hand as if to brush off the topic.
Wait, I'm sitting in front of G.o.d himself? This is insane.
"So… Are you the Christian G.o.d? Judaism? Hindu? What are you?"
I may as well find out while I'm here after all.
"All of them at once I suppose. They're all the same thing really. I should sort that whole mess out at some point…" the old man trailed off while looking away and scratching his short white beard.
The old man seemed to be in deep thought until he cupped one hand and hit it with his fist. "Ah! We're getting away from the main conversation. You, Kenji Fujima, have died. It is my duty to decide what happens from this point."
This man calling himself G.o.d pointed straight at me while making an incredible declaration.
"Woah, so... you decide if I'm going to heaven or h.e.l.l?"
"Or get reincarnated! That's the job."
Oh, right. As G.o.d, he would also handle all that too.
G.o.d pulled out his book once again and opened it up while closely inspecting a page.
"Hmm... It appears as if you haven't really done much in life. It's probably because you're only 17 years old. I can't blame you for that. Hmm… Well, unfortunately for you, I can't exactly send you to heaven based on your results from life."
s.h.i.t.
"Well, you can get reincarnated or you can go to h.e.l.l."
"WHAT KIND OF OPTIONS ARE THOSE? I CAN EITHER BURN FOREVER OR BE REBORN?" I stood up and slammed the table. This is outrageous.
"Well, yes. That's how this works." G.o.d said in a matter of fact tone.
We both silently stared at one another for a little while.
Suddenly, G.o.d looked as if he remembered something and held his finger up. "Ah! Oh yes, of course! I almost forgot the other option! You like anime, manga, and games, right?"
"Huh? Oh, yes I like that stuff. Hey wait, don't forget important things right now!" I shouted as I wept internally.
"There is another option exclusive to young people such as you! You can be reborn in another world like one of those anime or manga you like so much!"
Wait, did G.o.d just say what I think he said? Is this actually happening?
"Essentially what's happening is that this world I would send you to is under attack by some evil being. Call him the demon king or whatever you want, that's what the locals call him anyways."
This is just like the plot of so many novels and manga I've read! I can't believe this is real!
"And my job is to defeat this demon king guy?" I asked, already knowing the answer.
"Yes, you are correct. I need you to kill this being. You're basically a hitman for G.o.d. Doesn't that sound appealing?"
Woah woah woah! Is this really real? I get to be an isekai protagonist? That's crazy! I get to learn magic and fight with swords and build a harem with a big b.o.o.bed onee-san, a tsundere loli, and maybe even a monster girl! All my dreams are coming true! Dying is the best thing that's ever happened to me! Thank you Mr. Hoodie!
"Um… h.e.l.lo, are you listening?" asked G.o.d as I felt my fantasies crashing back down.
I just realized I had been sitting in my mind for the better part of a minute.
"Oh, yeah, haha sorry I was lost in thought!" I rubbed my head. I'm blushing. How embarra.s.sing.
"Oh, well I was saying that I wouldn't recommend you take this option."
"..."
What the h.e.l.l? Why would G.o.d tell me about this and then proceed to tell me not to take it? Is G.o.d teasing me? This is a bit ridiculous.
"Huh? Why not? Did I do something wrong?"
"Well, you're fat." G.o.d replied tersely.
"…" x2
Both of us sat still in the room and stared at one another for a while.
The silence in the room is quite disturbing. After some time, I finally decided to break the silence.
"Is that… the only reason?" I timidly asked.
"Well, it's certainly the biggest reason, no pun intended! Haha!" G.o.d announced while slapping his stomach.
"…"
"Look, the hero has to be a gallant handsome guy that works hard and tries his best no matter what! You're a fat guy that likes manga and video games!"
You know what? I hate G.o.d.
"Look, don't take it personally."
"I'm finding it hard not to."
"Well then take it personally."
"…"
I'm getting increasingly frustrated.
"Can I go to the isekai world anyway? Even despite your warning?"
"Huh? Oh yes of course. It's just a warning after all! Haha!"
Well, not all hope was lost. Still, if I'm going to go to an isekai world I need to know a few things.
"Okay. I have a few questions first if you don't mind answering them."
"Oh, of course. I am happy to answer any questions you may have so long as they're in my capacity to do so."
This is good. I have G.o.d answering my questions. Infinite knowledge is at my fingertips.
"Okay. Well… First and most important question: Will I be able to understand the language of this world?" Best to start with the basics after all.
"Yes. All individuals transported to another world are imbued with the knowledge of the common language of that world. You'll be able to read, write, and speak the language fluently as if you've done it your whole life!"
Great! So I won't have to depend on some form of translation!
"Will doing this make me forget how to understand j.a.panese?"
"No."
"Will I get sick from the diseases of this world?"
"I will alter your immune system to work as if you have lived on this planet your entire life."
So I won't get sick from the diseases of this world easily. That's a relief.
"Are there other people in this world from j.a.pan, or really, Earth?"
"Yes. There are about 30 people from Earth on this world."
That's shockingly low. I guess most people just don't want to live out the isekai dream. I pity them.
"Why are you pulling people from Earth to this world?"
"People from Earth understand the concept of being brought to another world thanks to things like games or books. The process runs smoothly when dealing with people from Earth when you compare it to people on Pluto."
"People live on Pluto?"
"We're getting ahead of ourselves."
G.o.d just dodged an important topic.
"Why are only young people like me given this option?"
"Young people are able to get into their physical prime and be strong enough to battle monsters and the like. I can't grab someone in their fifties and expect them to go around becoming the next hero of the world, can I? That just doesn't make sense. Of course, you're not exactly in your physical prime either."
Well, G.o.d has a point there, even if he was being a jerk about it.
"What's the human population of this world?"
"About 73,621,996 humans in total."
Wow, that's really low compared to Earth. This world I'm going to must be a medieval society or something along those lines.
"Are there typical fantasy powers? Do I get magic? Do I get superhuman abilities?"
"Yes but you need to work for them."
Yes! Magic! Sword skills! Super strength! I get to have them! This is my dream come true!
"Do I get a cheat item or ability like in K*****ba?"
"I don't know what K*****ba is, but you get to understand the language."
Huh? Maybe G.o.d just didn't understand my question.
"No, I mean like a sword that kills everything in one hit or super strength."
"What? Why would I give you that? You get the language and some clothing appropriate for the world you'll appear in and that's it. If I was able to send people down there with items like that then I wouldn't really have a problem with a demon king, would I?"
He has a point, but this might be bad for me.
"Will I… become fit when I get transported there?"
"No. You'll still be fat."
"So I'm just expected to fend for myself out there?"
"Yes of course. I did tell you I didn't recommend doing this."
"…"
What the h.e.l.l? You're just dumped onto another planet, not a coin to your name and no powers either and you're expected to defeat a great demon king? Why would anyone want to do this?
"Any other questions?"
I may as well make a 100% educated decision before I get reincarnated.
"How do I gain power? Is it a linear thing or do I level up? How does it work?"
"You level up like in a video game. Killing monsters gets you experience points towards your next level. You can also train to gain experience points but it's far slower."
So I get to level up by killing monsters. Sounds like a lot of grinding in order to get stronger.
"Oh, what types of monsters are there?"
"Your standard fantasy fare. Slimes, dragons, goblins, other things too."
Wait… if there are standard fantasy monsters, then that must mean...
"Are there… Cat girls?" I looked at G.o.d with expectant eyes full of hope.
After a long pause, G.o.d finally replied in a disapproving tone. "…Yes there are cat girls."
I need to go to this fantasy world right now. There is not a second to waste.
"You sure do ask a lot of questions..." Mumbled G.o.d.
I feel like G.o.d's respect for me has gone down a notable amount, but I don't really mind.
"Where do I show up in this fantasy world?"
"I'll send you to a town that's really far away from the so-called 'demon king'. The town is called 'Ruks' and you'll find a lot of lower level people there."
"Do I get any starting gear? Any money?"
"You get the clothes I give you and the ability to speak, read, and write the language of this world."
So no, I do not. Not even a little dagger or a rusted blade hilt like from D**k S***ls.
"This is really harsh, don't you think?"
"Well I did warn you."
"…" x2 We sat silently once again for a little while.
With how harsh this all is, it makes sense that there are only about 30 people from Earth on this other world.
After a little bit of thinking, G.o.d seemed to become impatient and asked me rather forcefully. "Hey… can you choose? I have to process a lot of other people and you're holding up the line."
Oh yeah. I forgot I was dead.
"I choose to go to this other world. What is it called?"
"The world of Kardia."
"Alright! I want to go to Kardia!"
I made my declaration! I am going to an Isekai world! Alright!
"Okay. Pick out a set of clothes from the wardrobe over there and head through the door. Good luck, don't die again. I don't expect anything from you."
Despite the fact that G.o.d was apparently a jerk, I picked out my clothes and opened the door.
"Oh yeah! If you somehow manage to defeat the so-called 'demon king' I'll grant you a wish of your choice!"
"A wish? What kind of-"
G.o.d shoved me through the doorway.
